But today, IвЂ™ll click on The New York Times and itвЂ™ll feel pretty normal.вЂќ вЂќ He goes on to say, вЂњMaybe a few months ago it would have upset me, even frightened me. вЂњLocal manвЂќ Alex Seidman is a 36-year-old who says he was so shocked by President Donald TrumpвЂ™s electoral win that, вЂњNone of it even fazes. Story вЂNothing Would Surprise Me At This Point,вЂ™ Says Man Who Will Be Shocked By 8 Separate News Items Today Plus, to this day, the article, first published in 2000, is on every вЂњ OnionвЂ™ s BestвЂќ article on the internet. Though we find their use of the word вЂњretardвЂќ inappropriate, we still canвЂ™t help but laugh at the premise (and masterful execution). The point of the article, clearly, is to demonstrates how heartless people can be in the wake of a tragedy if it means they are inconvenienced as a result. The article talks about how a toy named вЂњAqua Assault RoboFightersвЂќ was recalled after вЂњthree dumb kids managed to kill themselves playing with, ruining the fun for everybody else.вЂќ WeвЂ™ll be the first ones to admit The Onion isnвЂ™t exactly an international bastion of sensitivity, but this one is rough even for Onion standards. StoryДЇun Toy Banned Because Of Three Stupid Dead Kids You can see from that excerpt alone why clueless people lost their minds over it. ItвЂ™s time they cried their precious little eyes out.вЂќ ItвЂ™s time our children got the wake-up call thatвЂ™s been coming to them. вЂњYears of pampering have left our newborns helpless, feeble, and ill-equipped for the arduous road ahead. вЂњWe at Johnson & Johnson have been making bath time a safe and soothing experience for far too long,вЂќ says J&J CEO William C. The premise of the article is that todayвЂ™s infants are too вЂњsoft,вЂќ and the soap was an introduction to the harsh realities of an unforgiving world.

In 2008, The Onion released an article titled, вЂњJohnson & Johnson Introduces вЂNothing But TearsвЂ™ Shampoo To Toughen Up Newborns,вЂќ and the world went bonkers over it. Story Johnson & Johnson Introduces вЂNothing But TearsвЂ™ Shampoo To Toughen Up Newborns Hell, Snopes even had to debunk the myth. The article was quoted as fact in chain emails and by religious fanatics the world over, who humorously-but-definitely-not- that -humorously quoted it to support their actual claims that Harry Potter was a Satanism recruitment tool. The Onion has been around for a very long time (it was founded in 1988), but few of its stories led to more real-world controversy and consequence as the now-infamous 2000 article, вЂњHarry Potter Books Spark Rise In Satanism Among Children.вЂќ Harry Potter Books Spark Rise in Satanism Among Children These are the most famous The Onion articles ever written: WeвЂ™ve seen some real doozies from The Onion over the years, from sharp political commentary, to criticisms of religion, and what we believe is an overabundant amount of stories about McDonaldвЂ™s. The website receives over 10 million unique visitors every month, its content gets shared like wildfire, and it has since branched out to several different domains and sub-publications. Because the kid was so wealthy, he had no way of knowing that there would be consequences for his actions.In its 30-year history, The OnionВ has supplanted itself as the gold standard for modern satire. A wealthy teenager was sentenced to some light rehab after killing four people in a drunk driving accident, and the story might have ended there if it werenвЂ™t for the judgeвЂ™s reasoning. In 2014 we got the worst portmanteau ever: affluenza. Onion Headline: Wealthy Teen Nearly Experiences Consequences And every so often, the stars align and the punchline becomes real. The formula is hardly rocket science: They can take a cultural phenomenon-or someoneвЂ™s behavior, or a political movement-and extrapolate it to the point of absurdity. In the last few years, the phrase вЂњThis is just like The Onion predicted!вЂќ has been floated around, and it turns out the fake publication's writers have a knack for predicting news before it happens, sometimes years before.

Onion headline